Clay here, continuing our discussion about money and finances. Have you noticed that you and your partner are different?
Our approach to most things is usually different than our partner. This shows us for us in all areas of life but especially when it comes to money. Money issues are one of the top three reasons we have conflict in our relationship.
Each of our approaches to spending, budgets, etc. can be VERY different. For many of us, money is a trigger.
When we disagree about money issues, it usually is not about the money but a mindset. So how do we make differences on money our ally and not our adversary? It begins with awareness. All of us come with a history and things we observed, learned, and implemented when it comes to money. Whatever that history is, you and I bring it into our relationship in the now. So where did you learn to handle money? Who taught you? were they good at it? Did they spend out of pain or trying to keep up with the Jones’? Did they spend as fast as they got money? Or were they extremely frugal with money? Did they save? Did they not spend even to the point of not meeting their needs?
You see dear friend the rules, habits, and beliefs we have about money most of us learned from our caregivers. So what are those things for you? May I suggest you answer the above questions and see what both of you learned about money? Whatever that may be please understand it impacts your relationship and for many determines if it is safe to connect with my partner over this issue.
BEFORE YOU LOOK AT ACTION STEPS TO BUDGETS AND SPENDING, INQUIRE WHAT IS UNDERNEATH YOUR SPENDING!
Here for you,
Clay and Sonja
